Thursday, 5 January 2012

Why I am leaving VIK- An Open Letter to @YoungmindsUK


Sadly, after 3 years on the VIK panel, I am going to be leaving for pastures new. My reasons for this stem from what I felt was an extremely inappropriate way to speak to a young, vulnerable adult; and the subsequent complaints procedure and response that has left me emotionally raw, and in a state I feel could have been avoided. I am sick of feeling upset all the time about it to be honest, and would feel much better no longer a part of the organisation.

Firstly I would like to state that in no way to I wish to undermine all the work Youngminds, VIK, staff and volunteers have done to campaign for equality, justice and education to the public and statutory bodies for us young people, who are dealing or have dealt with mental health problems in their everyday lives. I did have a little rant on Twitter, but I wanted to provide some context in the hope that people understand I'm not merely into some kind of “slagging match” for some flippant reason, but that it was a result of distress from the manner of Bill Badham and subsequent failures in the complaints procedure that has left me feeling like my voice, and distress, had not been taken seriously.

Without going into too much detail (although I'm willing to provide more detail if people would like it), my initial complaint was in regards to the manner of Bill when I was stuck in London following the VIK day in November. I wish to stress that I am not calling into question the efforts that were made to provide me help in the situation, but rather the way in which this was done. I do not believe, at a time I was already immensely distressed as a result of cancelled trains and closed tube stations in London leading to me missing my train back home, it was at all appropriate to be constantly reminded that “now yet more funds will need to be used” in order to solve the situation. I also don't believe it was appropriate to get angry about my difficulties in trying to contact a member of staff (mostly as a result of the battery of my mobile phone being unreliable at the time), or getting cross because I could not get more information out of the information desk (bearing in mind anxiety when dealing with other people historically can be a huge problem for me). As a result of the three conversations I had with him on a payphone in King's Cross station, I was left in tears when I had finally managed to get in contact with my parents. I had already resigned myself to having to stay in the station overnight (which didn't bother me so much), but the very least I would have expected was a supportive ear in a time of need, as opposed to sarcastic and demeaning comments such as “I can't exactly magic a plane to you”. In the end things managed to get sorted through my uncle who lives nearby.

As a result of the severe worsening of my mental condition following these events, I decided to write a complaint talking about the events in detail, including timestamped phone calls/text messages where these were retrievable, from leaving the VIK event to the alternative transport arrangements with my uncle. I wasn't out for anyone's scalp, my intention was to ensure things could be put into place to reduce the likelihood of transport arrangements going wrong again, and so that some kind of review on how staff deal with their emotions towards volunteers This included the suggestion some kind of peer support as part of the management structure; the point being it isn't a problem to feel angry, but it would be more appropriate to express this anger among supportive colleagues and definitely inappropriate to express this towards volunteers or those that use the services of Youngminds. I also went to great lengths to point out my own mistakes that I could learn from.

I was quite shocked therefore to the response I had received from this complaint; learning points on transport arrangements and where cancellations should come into play for risk assessments were certainly taken into account. But the most glaring omission, from my point of view, was any reference to staff conduct or any kind of apology for what was said, either by Bill or Youngminds. The response was concluded by an “apology” for how I felt. In the words of James Dale's book “The Obvious”, this can be defined as a non-apology with the translation: “I didn't do anything wrong, but you seem to think I did, so to make you feel better, I'll apologise but I won't mean it.” I didn't get any response from a follow-up e-mail asking whether we should record all of our conversations with staff to insure against these kinds of situations in the future.

A month and a half went by, with nothing other than a letter reiterating the response I had received by e-mail. And it wasn't until a few days ago I started becoming incredibly bothered by the whole situation again. A friend had pointed out to me that, considering Youngminds is a mental health charity, they were quite shocked no kind of follow-up letter, e-mail or phone call had been made. Even if they disagreed with upholding the complaint, not even a “hi, are you ok?”, or some kind of supportive actions, were made. Especially considering this is an organisation that advises other organisations on participation and children/young peoples/service user involvement, it seems mind-boggling that no kind of assistance to see if I felt my voice had been heard, and how I feel the complaints procedure went (Which can be distressing for the best of people, let alone those that may be vulnerable or in a bad way). This for me was the final straw.

I cannot be part of an organisation that, for whatever reason, is unable to put its own advice on participation into practice. As I said, Youngminds has done a hell of a lot of good; the commissioning process in Hampshire, the VIK manifesto and input into government strategy on mental health services for young people are all VIK and Youngminds projects I have been proud to take part in. And, despite my negative experience with Bill, he has created such change in the passion and enthusiasm within the group. And this is why I felt so betrayed by the experiences of the last few months.

For all the good work that charities do, I don't believe this should shield them from any kind of criticism. No organisation or person can do no wrong, and I believe this idea can be hugely damaging. That is the way of benevolent dictatorships, and eventual crumble from not learning from mistakes. All it would have taken, from the conversation with Bill in November to my inbox in the last few days, was a sorry. Even the NHS, within the first few lines of a complaint's response, will genuinely apologise in the first few sentences (and not just for “how you felt”). For whatever reason this wasn't possible from Youngminds, probably as this would have been an acknowledgement that something had gone wrong; which of course isn't possible in these days of damage limitation and NHS contracts. It became, as I have seen many times with other people detained by the NHS, or police force, or other business, yet another tale of a well-known staff member versus a known unknown (and possibly insane) “service user”. And, as I have spoken out against organisations that have this attitude, I cannot volunteer for an organisation that falls into the same trap.

At the end of the day it's your choice whether you believe or disbelieve my experiences from that night. I'd hope that I have never built up a reputation of making things up to spite people, or to be subversive. You could also choose to criticise me for not bringing this up at the next VIK meeting- although I feel extremely unsafe in placing the trust of my wellbeing in this organisation right now, in case things again went wrong. You could also say I didn't exhaust the entire complaints procedure (there is one more level of complaint I could have made)- however I didn't see the point in this complaint again being investigated internally, but only by people a bit higher up.

To be honest I have to say, after posting this, I am not going to worry myself over it anymore. This has eaten up the last 2 months of my life with an extremely low mood, ruined my holiday and ruined my christmas. I have other things in my life I need to focus on and make a difference in.

In hope

Gary Watts

P.S. Could you please remove me from all correspondence from Youngminds, unless it is directly related to my complaint.
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